I feel like I've fallen off a horse. I have had that experience, when I was a small child, and they said you have to get right back on... so I did, we were on a trail so I had to anyway... but that's a rule. You have to get back on or you get spooked and it's harder, and I have that same feeling right now. Yet I'm spooked. I know this can be used to my benefit, but it feels like right now it's going to paralyze me. I don't want to let my husband down. I'm sure he's worried I'm going to lose our retirement. I'm trying to do the opposite, he works so hard. 

Today I made such awful choices that I don't want to upload the trades, in fact, I'm still in two, one is not such a huge loss. I'm in one that's like.. .so embarrassing. Why would anyone do what I did? Why can't I not do that? Why can't I just not make these horrible decisions? Basically I've engaged in gambling behaviors. This is not okay. I get so foggy when it comes crunch time. For one, I don't like etrade pro. 

I don't like the charts I was looking at, but I should probably be choosing "Classic" charts. Sometimes they don't show charts over time, just for a few days, as if the stock just came on the market a week ago... and so I think oh that's a glitch. And I see a runner and go for it. Who could have known the severity of CTRM would go up a couple bucks and then DOWN, and so fast. 

Had I known more about the company and done some due diligence, or just followed basic common sense I would not have chased or tried to change my losses through averaging. 

 

Tim's watch list for today sent in email, first stock:

"Castor Maritime Inc (CTRM:NASDAQ) reported Q3 earnings Thursday, the announcement of a new contract, and the delivery of a new vessel, doubling their fleet & increasing annual cash flow. CTRM traded up over 35% to $5.28.

Castor Maritime Inc., through its subsidiary, Spetses Shipping Co., acquires, owns, charters, and operates dry bulk vessels worldwide. It provides seaborne transportation services for dry bulk cargo, including iron ore, coal, grains, steel products, fertilizers, cement, bauxite, sugar, and scrap metals." 

It's not my experience that a stock like this would run up a dollar while I was watching it, and then drop two dollars down, back to a low, low. 
I didn't have a chart to look at over time, due to how Etrade pro was acting, and I kept thinking, go to the website and look at the charts there. Look somewhere else, but I was in the moment, and saw an opportunity to "dip buy" a runner... HA. So yeah maybe this could happen to many people, but really I did the risky thing, and was acting in the moment due to this fear of saying later, why on earth did you watch it sit so low and not get more and get some profit on the way back up? 

But we always have to think: it may never come back up. I just didn't imagine it so quick on one day. Anyway, I've held on for another day and don't know how long I'll have to hold it to get some back, I really hope that I can get some back tomorrow. 

There's an article on something with this stock but I don't understand what they are actually saying. Are they saying they will keep the price down? 
Like what does this mean? 
http://www.stocksequity.com/active-stocks/current-price-to-free-cash-flow-p-fcf-under-consideration-castor-maritime-inc-nasdaqctrm/

This is the most expensive school I've ever been in where there is nobody to really talk to.