From late 2016 as a 19 year old kid lust struck by my newfound understanding of the potential in the market, small cap land specifically at the time for me. I'm from Northern California so without a doubt i grew up around weed and big pot farms, the whole market in the underworld connected from family member to friends. Coming from a small house in the hood(crackhead central) is what i always called it, tbh my pops was lucky to even get into this house he traded his harley as a down payment to his friend who was a local landlord type cash rich shady business guy. but he was my dads good friend and my dad showed up every month on time in person to the old couples home across town to pay rent, they respected and gain trust for him and all was well we could live in our little 90k house. i went to school a town over as my mom has residence there in public housing or with one of her boyfriends somewhere in town. Although both my parents were avid meth users yet functional and supportive in caring way always they were great parents and my dad miraculously got clean and a small job with a guy who believed in him who drug tested him weekly to help him. my mother eventually had a stroke one night and was in UC Davis for a year and a half from a drug related incident. Just going to hard working her job and staying up at night on top of taking care of me and my older sis she came across some bad drugs and that was that. She still has a sort of a limp and half her body is sorta paralyzed to this day she is a BEUATIFUL soul literally beautiful on the outside as ever before (she was a hottie back in the day) still is, totally! never even considered drugs after this. today its over a decade later from that and she is great! but back to me. i grow up growing weed with my dad and eventually doing my own gardens, involved in the streets as a curious intruiged kid and the expirences that brings, a path you can only imagine. But i took my 5k cash one harvest and attempted trading this new found legal way right, so exciting but i obviously blew up within 2 months. this happened a few more minor times some taking longer than others all while studying and staying up all night divulging into everything i though could help me understand the market. One day while im away from town, in the town my mom lives and I went to school, one of my childhood bestfriends who I had'nt seen in years due to him getting kicked out of school at 14 was caught doing a armed robbery on my moms home. Lucikly my moms new man whom she still is with today put ADT on their home that year and it caught him in the act. He was supposedly strung to his gills on meth going around robbing everyone, local stores, people he knew, even his friends, etc. I was furious when i heard the news as my mom is half paralyzed and he knows that, she could'nt of even helped herself and she took care of this fuvker when we was young. Anyways i post it on my instagram story and had hundreds of my people and people i knew tune in only to have his little sister who i grew up around while being with him as a young cat and she says listen jimmy, my brother is in a bad place and has gone off the deepend dealing with addition and all this and that, she asked me kindly to take the post down out of embarassment and I did that for her out of repsect for her and his mom who loved me and fed me once before many times. Life and times in the street as a young handsome white kid in nor cal deeply rooted in the mix of the underworld. Time goes on I do my thing, some shit i cant talk about in this period, lol right, but me and my main mans B Dog (who recently passed away at 24 years old) been on some missions, touching decent cash liquid cash at 18 19, pulling up in brand new challengers we both had, memorial times is what I can say to say the least with all the attention of the baddest girls and their boyfriends mad at us lol. Honest and respectful young men who shared a common vison, a clear vivid picture of where we could be if we are on point, not yet fully knowing the forces we were up against. I'm ever so grateful to be here with my expirence and lessons learned amongst other things but B Dog was'nt quite able to shake the bad luck and left us, Cruz in peace B Dog, you'll forever be a part of me Vivid memories I'm nothing but thankful for today. My brother gets out of a 10 year prison bid and rather quickly becomes popular in a notorious motorcycle gang and the network within locally. knowing me right, doing what I'm doing growing, i have connections and my own underground network of surprising nor cal characters with liquid cash if you got good shit. so my brother and I do some gardens, I do my own still all over, he does some, I move some of his packs when he cant, etc. well one night he pulls up with my dad and their Harley's. I'm inside eating my popeyes chicken and he comes in takes some fries and says what's up and all that then takes off home after saying goodbye. 15 minutes later my dad gets a call sitting there with me and jumps up, i can feel his rampant emotions immediatly and he tells me my brothers been shot at a stoplight in a drive by. my dad pops open the safe after throwing his boots on and tosses me a shotgun telling my to shut off the lights and anyone who comes through your door shoot em and takes of fast as ever on his bike. once that night and for weeks after that even months i had tinted out cars lurking on my dead end st, following me around town on occasion it seemed, some deep shit. It left me scarred even to this day i have effects from that a bit. You don't know the feeling of death or someone trying to kill your family until it ever happens, it shapes a whole new perspective of survival and trust relations. I don't wish that feeling on anyone. my brother recovers and is in a better place today luckily. But during this time in the first year or two as a new trader this sidelined me along with normal cost of living a young person is faced with when they must support themselves. I chose a better life, to put my faith in my passion for the markets, this amazingly beautiful thing I've discovered as I'm sure so many had before, nowadays even more and i see my inexpirenced self in a fair share of newbies. Little do they know just how unforgiving of a place the den of screens is. That market tuition is real but for a passionate fascinated young man like me its a journey. Today I'm successful supporting myself in a new place which i always desired at heart, I'm a seasoned/wiser trader than ever before. Understanding i wont make it anywhere without first addressing risk and risk implementation into a developed system. I've designed one single, simple yet in depth page that encapsuls my expirience into a system personalized to first and forth-most address risk, sizing, scaling, etc. This is my foundation only then moving to edge and my strategies/systems. Hopefully from here on out im able to apply my knowledge and continue down my journey im so grateful to be on and seize the opportunity being creative and my best self. Maybe someday some young guy or girl will search this in an effort to understand where i was coming from and how i made it happen. I'm ever so worthy one day lol.. If that kid is you, ill tell you this much. Focus on risk before you apply your edge. Keep a cash reserve to where if you happened to lose it all you'd still be in the position that works for you with that cash reserve, and consider not "diversifying" in different stocks but diversifying your net worth into uncorrelated assets that have profit potential for you as its somewhat proven to decrease risk without decreasing profit actually potentially increasing profit. Study charts and fimiliarize yourself with what YOU see, screentime is worth it day by day. And if you really love this shit, track data, get creative with it and do it for long periods of time, the more data the better. The more money the better, every dollar counts. And thank you for reading. Much love and respect to a fellow visionaire.