I have been studying well over 2 years. Studying the free content available online and within this amazing community. 2 years. And only just recently, I actively started to trade. That is, I have executed 5 trades over the period of >1 month. Not that much I reckon.

These 5 trades have caused me to lose $120 of my $3000 account. 

Do I feel bad about it? Not at all. I would have done every one of these trades again. I have made plans for each of them the day before, and executed the plans to 'perfection' (cutting losses in time in basically all cases).

The thing I like about it all, is that I am able to take out my emotions completely so far. When a trade is going against me, I have no problems cutting losses. So I'm proud to say that I do well on rule #1. (so far, at least. Let's see what I do once my position size can be increased lol)

The thing is, I'm a very scared trader. Heck, why do you think it took me >2 years to finally get started? I'm very skeptical about this entire thing. I know I have the knowledge and capabilities to become a trader, but I don't know yet if I have the right character for it. Will my emotions allow me to day trade? I don't know yet. Which is why this process is a very slow one for me. But that's also why I'm entirely happy with where I'm at at the moment.

Yesterday, I did my watchlist again (I post the spreadsheets on my twitter account HJHStocks), and I noticed VKTX as an earnings winner. I wanted to see if volume could continue to push this stock up. After the market open, I saw it happening. Volume was big in the morning, it started dipping, and I bought 900 shares at 1.35, anticipating a bounce near support. The stock showed support, but unfortunately the bounce did not happen. I got out at about 1.38, just covering my commissions. Looking back, these entries and exits were quite good.

I did not make money, but I'm happy to keep learning the way I do. Every trade, I learn something new. How do I react emotionally to pricemoves? How does my trading platform work? Am I willing to trust my own technical analysis? How does IB try to take as much commissions from me as possible (lol)?

I learn something every trade, all while sticking my head out there. This $120 I lost so far does not hurt me. Heck, out of this $120, $74 is just commissions... I absolutely like what's happening at the moment. I am very slowly gaining confidence this way. If at some point, I can prove to be consistently profitable, I will add to my account, increasing position sizing.

It might be nice to give an example about my way of scared thinking. Everytime a stock actually does what I wanted it to do in my watchlist, I get freaked out. I'm thinking, fuck, it's moving exactly as I wanted it to move. Now I might have to enter a position. A part of me tells me to fuck it all, and just watch from the sidelines. I don't want to risk money in this stock. I think of all the reasons why this stock would turn against me, instead of the other way around. So as it nears my entry price as I wrote about in my watchlist, I'm thinking 'fuck, fuck, fuck, now I have to enter'.  What keeps me from actually pussying out of the trade is the fact that I have really been missing  a lot of plays lately, where I would not execute trades according to my plan, and they would turn out to be >10% profits. An even bigger part of me does not want to be watching from the sidelines when these nice profitable moves happen again and again. Some people might call this FOMO, but that's not what this is. Because these were the stocks that I have been talking about the day before anyway. I have already planned the trade entirely. However, as soon as the stock actually reaches my entry price, I get these scared feelings. 

Not yesterday, I forced myself to enter VKTX at my entry level, and I'm happy I did it. I was able to turn off my fear and just go with my initial plan. So I bought at 1.35 and exited at 1.38 ish when the stock did not do what I wanted. Commissions were $24 (I have to ask IB why it's that high), and there goes all my profits lol.

I think I'm drifting off topic...

What I basically want to say, is that I feel so good about what I'm doing. Even though it's a slow process, and I'm losing money, I still have control over all my trades. I am learning each trade, and slowly gaining more confidence. This has basically been my goal ever since I started studying stocks over 2 years ago: to just stick my head out there.

My next goal will be to actually land a >10% profit. I can only imagine how that must feel. I already get excited if I'm able to breakeven on a stock, lol.

Good luck trading guys, comments are always appreciated. I'm always open for discussion or general talk.